Below is the mug shot belonging to 44 y/o Robert Mettler of Oklahoma. He gives new meaning to the term “sick puppy”, but we’ll get there:
The next mug shot belongs to Robert’s wife, 42 y/o Brenda Mettler, who, well, we’ll get there too…
Finally we come the likeness of their since deceased white boxer, name unknown, may s/he RIP…
Robert and Brenda have been charged with “sodomy, animal cruelty and distribution of obscene material” because A) Robert is truly a sick puppy, fantasizing about women, human women, including his wife, engaging in sex acts with dogs, meaning 4-legged canines, not sloppy humans; B) Brenda is sufficiently mentally defective to have acted in a manner intended to satisfy her man, er sick puppy, er, boxer… whatever; C) Apparently unable to keep his depraved longings private, Robert had to go and share them with his f*cked up bestophile cyber-friends by uploading a video of his boxer performing oral sex on his wife to an internet bestiality forum; and D) Apart from being a f’ing freak Robert is also an idiot, having posted the doggie-cunnilingus video onto the net from his cell phone (thereby making it all too easy for the cops to identify him and secure a search warrant for his home and computers).
The police found “a cache of videos showing various breeds of dogs performing sexual acts on women, including intercourse” and Robert, genius that he is, decided to speak to the police. Hey Robert:
At first ‘ole Bobby tried to deny knowledge of the video having been published, not denying the footage but claiming to be a hacking victim, but when confronted with the proof that the video had been uploaded from his cell phone he admitted that watching dogs have sex with women was a fantasy of his.
For her part Brenda claimed that it was a one-and-done affair with the since deceased pooch (begging the question as to what exactly killed the boxer…).
Bobby: First off…
Secondly, I have absolutely no sympathy for you. You are a demented bastard and I do not believe that you are either salvageable or worth the effort. Thus, as an animal (the 4-legged variety) lover (platonic lover, like normal folks) I hope that A) your defense lawyer is a complete legal nitwit who doesn’t get enough sleep and has blood sugar issues when you are scheduled for Court, B) your prosecutor, Judge and Jury panel are all proud card carrying members of the ASPCA & PETA and C) you get sufficient jail time in a brutal enough institution so as to truly come to appreciate what the term “doggie style” means.
Finally, if justice is served and you do go away to the nasty stripey hole then, to help pass the time, I will personally send you a copy of the PETA approved guide to bestiality (you sick f*cker).
Brenda: Brenda, Brenda Brenda… Being married to Robert and being forever humiliated satisfies me. As far as I am concerned you have been sufficiently punished.
Established in 1991, Michael A. Haber, P.A. has an unblemished record of providing creative, effective and zealous representation to clients, primarily in South Florida, on a wide variety of criminal matters ranging from DUI to drug trafficking and from misdemeanors to first degree murder.
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Top notch, very skilled, and highly attentive. Mr. Haber is a fantastic criminal defense attorney. 
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